Nothing Cool About Democrats’ Woke Religion

December 1, 2024 by J.B. Shurk

Right now Democrats are publicly debating the reasons for their electoral implosion. I use the word “debating” rather loosely, since being a leftist requires a great deal of self-censorship. Democrats can discuss fellow cult members’ obsession with chemically castrating children only so much before the great priests of the party denounce them as “transphobic.” Only a few morsels of truth about the mass invasion of foreign nationals can be articulated out loud before a faithful adherent of the open borders liturgy rises with indignation, extends a long finger in the speaker’s direction, and condemns the apostate a “hateful bigot.” No-one who wishes to remain in good standing with the Democrat church would dare question the crippling effects of “green energy”-induced inflation. Challenging the all-important “climate change” cannon is strictly verboten.

So, in the op-ed pages of the failing New York Times and during the prime-time group therapy sessions broadcast from the bankrupt studios of CNN and MSNBC, Democrat operatives tiptoe around many taboo subjects while suggesting to their fellow congregants that the Democrat party must atone for its loss of earthly power. Influential clergymen from Barack Obama’s own “woke” order have even gone so far as to publicly confess the commission of what is by far the gravest Democrat sin: “We’re losing the culture war.”

Egad! That’s the one war Democrats are unwilling to lose! They must be perceived as the “cool” ones at all times. So imperiling is the prospect of surrendering their reputation for being hip and trendy that Democrats will do anything to remain relevant. Smug pretentiousness doesn’t look sexy when you’re constantly being depantsed in viral videos and on social media. Glib aloofness looks a lot like stupidity when ignorant celebrities can’t hide behind their pop-culture mystiques and glamour shots.

If Democrats aren’t in charge of the culture, they can’t be in charge of anything else for long either. Without a monopoly over the haute couture of fame and public adulation, they are no more than an odd collection of doomsayers, snake oil salesmen, carnival barkers, streetwalkers, has-beens, pseudo-intellectuals, hormone-raging adolescents, and empty suits. If the public sees them as they actually are, they will never be allowed to hold power again. It’s never good policy to let the inmates run the asylum. It’s downright deadly to give the inmates nuclear weapons and control over the economy.

Understandably, Democrats are freaking out about their loss of social prestige. They expected the public to defer to the wishes of noted climatologist (snark!) Greta Thunberg as she dictates to farmers across the globe what they can and cannot do with their private lands. They expected fearful citizens to obey the pandemic-loving Anthony Fauci’s every command. They expected women to vote for Kamala Harris because Taylor Swift endorsed her from a pyrotechnic-lit stage. They expected blue-collar workers to reject President Trump’s “America First” agenda because Robert De Niro wasted the last eight years playing an angry, old man with a single line: “F*ck Trump!” They expected Green Day’s hatred for MAGA voters to keep the “cool kids” caged on the Democrats’ soul-crushing plantation. Celebrities flooded the 2024 pop-culture space with anti-Trump histrionics, cringeworthy temper-tantrums, and a glut of Democrat party endorsements. The public tuned out all the noise and voted for Trump anyway.

You mean the Hollyweirdos, fake scientists, lip-syncing twerkers, aging rock stars, and teenaged “influencers” have lost control over the mind-melded masses? Gaia forfend! Quick, call in the liposuction plumbers, the botox brigades, and the lighting specialists: we must remind Americans that the celebrity class is filled with bona fide stars! Who do the folks living in the lowlands of the Missouri Bootheel think they are? When Bob De Niro, the queen of Swifties, and boy bands who are old enough to qualify for senior citizen discounts tell you to vote for Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, or Kamala Harris, you better hop to it! Being rich and famous entitles dumb people to tell working-class people what to do.

Or...just spitballing here...maybe Americans have grown tired of caring about the opinions of a bunch of California communists who pal around with sexual predators, debaucherous drug enthusiasts, habitual rehab guests, angry narcissists, profligate poobahs, and intellectual poseurs who can barely read. Perhaps Americans finally see Hollywood’s undeservedly rich and famous as the dimwitted, morally vacuous cretins and reprobates they’ve always been. Could that be why “woke” Disney, late night scolds posing as comedians, and politics-pushing actors have lost their influence over the American people? There’s no question that Hollywood’s stars have dimmed. Even aw-shucks “everyman” Tom Hanks now suffers at the box-office after pimping for the Democrats’ favorite flavors of socialism the last few years. (Spoiler alert: all the flavors of socialism taste like dirt because socialism always leads to murder, starvation, and mass graves.)

Americans have definitely seen through the celebrity class’s layers of plastic surgery and recognized Hollywood for what it is: a feeding ground for lost and damaged souls. Voters have rejected the political pablum of Rob Reiner, Rosie O’Donnell, Oprah Winfrey, George Clooney, Mark Ruffalo, and other Tinseltown snobs because their opinions hold no weight. Americans can think for themselves. The good people of “flyover country” have nothing to learn from the vain pontifications of coastal “elites.”

There is a more salient reason why Americans of all backgrounds now avoid the Democrat party’s army of celebrity influencers as if their opinions were as malodorous as spoiled milk sitting under an Arizona sun: there is absolutely nothing “cool” about being a Democrat these days. If you want to get a stern lecture, you hang out with Democrats. If you want to have a good time with other happy people, you go to a Trump rally. If you scrutinize all jokes for their compliance with the tenets of “political correctness,” then you vote Democrat. If you make jokes without worrying about “triggering” somebody, then Democrat operatives are most likely censoring whatever you say online. Nobody likes being censored. And as shocking as this must be to Deep State Democrats, censorship isn’t “cool.”

Over Thanksgiving, President Trump released a Christmas Vacation parody in which he comically roasted his Democrat rivals. Vice President-elect Vance shared Norman Rockwell’s iconic Freedom from Want oil painting of Thanksgiving dinner and photoshopped the father and mother figures with Trump and Vance serving their family a beautiful map of Republican-voting America. Both posts were hilarious holiday treats that millions of Americans enjoyed seeing. Democrats, however, found the light humor terribly disturbing. After all, they’ve decried Donald Trump as “literally Hitler” for eight long years, and Americans should not be amused when “Hitler” trolls the political opposition with funny Internet memes. Haven’t Americans been listening to Democrats’ stern lectures: “Democracy” is at stake!

Democrats are not the party of “live and let live.” They are not the party of individualism, intellectual open-mindedness, or rebellion against the status quo. They are not the party of free speech or free expression.

They are the party of rules, regulations, and intrusive laws. They are the party of mandates, de-banking, social “cancellation,” and dogmatic beliefs. They are the thought police.

If you want to be told what you can and cannot do, you vote for Democrats. If you want to make your own decisions, you never vote for Democrats. The Democrat party has become nothing but a religious cult intent on punishing Americans for their heretical transgressions. It is no wonder, then, why Americans are running away from leftism and towards President Trump’s MAGA coalition. As Elon Musk’s mom recently observed, President Trump seems to be “having fun.” Happy Americans want to have fun, too. They voted accordingly.