As Kamala Campaigns, Nation Longs For The Clarity And Coherence Of Joe Biden

August 3, 2024 by The Babylon Bee

Kamala Harris

The initial "honeymoon" period showed signs of wearing off as Kamala Harris started to hit the campaign trail, and many throughout the nation expressed a yearning for the clarity and coherence of President Joe Biden.

"Sure makes you miss Joe's way with words, doesn't it?" asked one voter as Harris attempted to finish speaking a coherent sentence. "I know there were a lot of people who got really excited about Kamala in the last week or so, but man... when you hear her speak, it really highlights how great we had it the last few years with having a dementia patient giving speeches as president."

"Let me be clear," said Kamala, responding to the expressed concerns. "I have been clear from the beginning, and it's important that we realize the clarity of the current moment has moved on from the clarity of the past, of which we are all a part, and of which we must all continue to partake in the future, and the past, and the present. Clear is when something is see-through. Thank you."

Harris's delivery left many Americans reminiscing about how lucky the nation was to have Biden's obvious gift for public speaking and communication skills. "The difference is glaring," another voter said. "Joe really had a way with words, now that I think about it. It was definitely challenging to figure out what he was trying to say and he often made up words and muttered gibberish, but when you go from that to Kamala Harris, it makes you miss Biden's clarity and straightforward way of speaking."

At publishing time, new polls indicated most Americans supported bringing Joe Biden back into the presidential race.